1. Jet’s Pizza
a. Although it has not made its way out to Los Angeles (and I have looked), it is far and away the best.
b. The 8-corner pizza with its buttery crust could bring fat people to their feet.
c. The sauce and abundance of cheese are closely associated with the 7 Wonders of the World.
d. Their price is annoying (read: expensive) but not enough to throw them out of the top spot.
2. Papa Johns
a. Better ingredients, better pizza (than Dominos and Pizza Hut).
b. When they actually put effort into the pizza it is right up there with Jet’s for the coveted #1 spot. But when it is subpar, it is bad. They typically shoot right at 75% from the field, which can be good or bad depending on where you are.
c. Papa John, the person, seems like a cool guy to grab a coozie hugger with and talk about the garlic sauce for hours on end (I would bathe in that stuff if it was legal/sanitary).
3. Dominos
a. Revamped everything and it’s actually awesome all the way around.
b. The crust is the best crust out there. It’s the best closer since Eric Gagne’s steroid filled 2002-2003 seasons in which he set the record for 63 straight saves. Their crust does not have steroids but it is that good.
c. I’m still somewhat scarred by the previous sauce which tasted not good.
4. Pizza Hut
a. Outside of their Stuffed Crust (which is lethally awesome), they aren’t in the top 3.
b. Their Stuffed Crust Pizza is the only reason why they are in the top 4.
c. Need to bring back their triple deck pizza and ultimate pepperoni (3 different cuts of pepperoni back in 2005).
Noticeably absent from this list are local pizzerias which would undoubtedly give all these guys a run for their money outside of Jet’s Pizza. Mafioza’s in Nashville is legit although stupidly expensive. Reno’s Pizza in Burbank, CA is awesomely good and priced to perfection. I’m contemplating opening this up for top pizza in the nation regardless of chain. More to come.
If you feel I’m wrong, send me a comment.
There are so many things wrong with this list.
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